Your Thoughts Exactly

1) While I have developed a more well-rounded view of the MLB through living a 20 minute walk from Wrigley Field, as well as the importance of our fantasy league, baseball still begins with the Red Sox. With the loss of Coco Crisp to injury, the offense is looking mediocre at best, especially against left-handers where Nixon sits, leaving a bottom four of Lowell-Wily Mo-Willie Harris-Adrian Gonzalez. Crisp’s injury has affected us in the field, where we are now starting Wily Mo full time in center, (after supposedly determining in the first week that he couldn’t play right.) Now that is some terrible outfield defense! Luckily Ortizzle and Manny (.449 OBP) have been keeping us afloat as usual.

2) Our pitching staff was predicated on a “Schilling-Beckett pray for rain,” attitude through the first three weeks of the season, which worked to a T. Then Beckett hit a bump in the road in his last two starts, and is now sporting a 4.86 ERA. Worse, his peripherals suck: 16BB/23K and 6 HRs. Beckett is young, throws hard with a nasty curve, and once pitched well for a week against the Yankees in the World Series. And he is white. But he isn’t a great pitcher. He LOOKS like a great pitcher, but he isn’t. Meanwhile Pedro Martinez continues to destroy for the Mets despite the fact he throws in the high 80s, and looks like his arm could fall off at any second. What’s that you say? The NL is easier to pitch in than the AL? True, but there are ways of adjusting for that (ERA+) which still show Pedro as the vastly superior pitcher. And yes, we would have to pay Pedro much more than Beckett, but we also picked up Lowell’s 9 mil a year deal as part of the price of getting Beckett, while giving up Hanley Ramirez (who would be starting at short for us,) and Anibal Sanchez. I recognize we won’t be able to accurately judge the loss of Pedro until 2008, but it ain’t looking good so far. Also, did you know that even in Pedro’s “fragile,” years (02-present,) he has pitched in more innings each year than Beckett has in any year in his career? And did you know that no pitcher threw more innings (including postseason,) than Pedro the last two years? And that Schilling is a 40 year old evangelical conservative biatch?

3) Ok I’ve got to stop ranting about former Red Sox pitchers. So let’s talk about Roger Clemens. First of all, this needs to stop. Sean McAdam, who I generally dislike, echoed my sentiments in his column discussing about how Roger pimps the limelight with regards to his retirement. For McAdam, it’s gotten old. For McMarmar, it got old in about 1993. Best case scenario: Clemens rejoins the Yankees, sucks for two months, gets in a brawl with Randy Johnson, and is busted for running a child porn ring involving Yankees ballboys and Steinbrenner’s nieces and nephews based out of the site of the new Freedom Tower. Worst case scenario: Clemens signs with the Red Sox and idiot Boston fans welcome him back. If this happens, I will handle it accordingly, by refusing to acknowledge Clemens’ presence on the team through ignoring any game in which he drags his fat apostate ass to the hill.

4) One last note on former Red Sox: I would have stood and applauded Johnny Damon on his return to Fenway. However, that is a one time deal. With his hair and beard gone, wearing pinstripes, he represents a different person than the lovable Johnny Jesus who once patrolled our center field. The only similarity to Jesus that remains is that they are both oh so hateable.

5) I’ve been to a few Cubs games so far this year (three to be exact,) and am going to my first White Sox game yesterday. Wrigley is a great place to watch the game, it shares the same old school feel as Fenway, the sense that people were doing the same thing in the 1920s, with more comfortable seats and fewer poles in the way. I am a big fan of the “Take me Out to the Ball Game,” tradition, as well as the ridiculous amount of cute girls in Cubs gear. Everyone there is having a good time, watching their beloved Cubbies win or lose. Right on!

6) Which is a good thing, because the Cubbies will be doing plenty of losing this year. If not for the revival of Greg Maddux, the Cubs would be challenging for last place. Ok that’s not true, because the Pirates are terrible. But in a difficult, with an unlucky injury to D-Lee (who is their offense,) the Cubs are relying on the return of Kerry Wood and Mark Prior to keep them afloat. Relying on perpetually injured pitchers to carry is frustrating, but I trust the Cubs fanbase to keep their heads up, or at least to be too distracted by beer and those cute girls to care.

7) I also like “The Cell,” as it’s called, although I think I am unable to accurately judge baseball stadiums built after 1920 since I am stunned that 1) I can fit in the seats and 2) none of the seats are obstructed by large poles. The White Sox thus far look pretty dangerous, and as good a pick as any to win the World Series in 06.

8) And finally, I would like to report that I am still in first place in our fantasy keeper league. It’s not bad enough that I am the best looking member of the blog, I am also beating Dave at his own game. How will he respond? Only time will tell.

# posted by Marmaniac @ 12:52 PM